So, the Goats. Our family was blessed with two brand new grandsons in the past few weeks and, by tradition, two goats (each) had to succumb to gastro-intestinal juices of friends and relatives. This is also known as Aqeeqa. Being a proponent of Eat What You See movement, the four goats had to be procured from the market, brought home, diced up nice-like, and then distributed according to a ranking scheme that only my mother knows (and which is sure to crash the BCS servers, if programmed).
As per, I tried my best to have as little to do with any of this as possible. Fail.
The Bakra Mandi (Goat Market) lies at the south-westerly end of the city. In the off-season, it is usually the place to go for goats/lambs/etc. During the season (two months prior to the big Eid), hundreds of small markets spring up in any old empty plot across the city.
The market is wide, smelly, and packed with the cast of characters from Kipling's Kim (substitute Goats for Horses). I kid you not.
The goats are lined up on charpais - often tied across the necks so that they can't roam around.
The market has three main characters: the herder/seller, the buyer and the deal-maker.
Upon walking into the market, you will look around, and wonder - loudly - why there is such crap in the market. You will maybe remind yourself - again, loudly - about the most awesome animals you had just purchased last week for a pittance. You will maybe add a few more lines about the general decay in the fortune of Muslims around the world and what the lack of Caliphate has done to the trade in goats. Before you have finished your heart-wrenching account, a deal maker will approach you. He will be a man in his upper 40s to mid 50s - carrying about his shoulders a throw-around shawl and lots of lived life. He will say, come, all is not lost. Let me show you why you are looking at this all the wrong way. Now, at this point, you still have a choice. You can rebuff the deal-maker and keep on looking for yourself. But there is no happy glow at the end of that road.
The deal-maker will take you to one or two "tables" - asking, in the meanwhile, how much you want to spend, judging if you know anything about goats (oh, ai khasi ey - "gay goat!"), etc. Depending on your remarks, the size of your entourage, and your general clothing/get-up, he will guide you to the appropriate herder. You will look at one or two animals and price quote will be asked for. You will be given a price roughly 3 times whatever. You will express shock, dismay and turn away. The deal-maker, will clutch you, and ask the herder to please stop whoring his mother and give you a fair price. The herder will violently shake off the deal-maker, and declare that while the sister of the deal-maker is known to have an easy way, he is far above such petty things. At this moment, you will be intricately entwined - limbs and all - with the herder, the deal-maker, and some random dude who was just passing by. The shawls will come off. The deal-maker will slap, yes slap, the herder. Wild punjabi slang and cusses will mimic the yellow stream of goat piss. Fun.
Eventually, the deal-maker will have push, shove, punch the herder into accepting an offer roughly 1/3 of the initial cost. This process will not be helped if your Chicago-living nephew is standing aloof snapping pictures with his digital camera. Such citizen-journalism rubs people the wrong way. He will be asked to explain himself. The deal-maker will, at this time, get his commission from you. After you depart, he will also get a commission from the herder. The cycle will then repeat.
The goats acquired, they will need to be transported to the house. This is where rickshaws come in.
Once home, the goats undergo a simple process and are converted into giant buckets of diced meat. I will spare you those pics.
But, for the fans of the Pa'ia dish, featured yesterday, here is the process.
COMMENTS
Jonathan Dresner | February 05, 2009
I kid you not. It had to be said. Now I have to decide whether to share these wonderful pictures of goats (and derivative products) with my seven-year-old, whose reaction to the Muppet Movie was to reject in the most heartfelt manner the idea that animals' rights and feelings should be subservient to man's.....
Another Damned Medie | February 05, 2009
And again, Sepoy makes me want to know more and do more (except for the actual goat slaughtering). I do have a question, though -- why do you not just lead the goats home? Or is home too far to walk?
Siddharth | February 05, 2009
Nice. Real nice. One of your best. and welcome back.
Desi Italiana | February 05, 2009
The first three thoughts that come to mind: 1. The cute bakris that rampaged the narrow streets of Gujarat when I went as a little girl two decades ago. 2. The tethered goats in the (unhygienic) meat markets of Kathmandu, with men wearing covering themselves in shawls in the same exact manner as those in these photographs. 3. The duck we had the in backyard. Apparently, a friend asked Uncle if he could keep the duck for a while. One day, I looked in the backyard, and cage and duck were nowhere to be seen. A few hours later, Uncle came home with a grimace on his face and a package. "I need to take a shower, I feel dirty," he said. He refused to eat the duck subji Auntie prepared.
Desi Italiana | February 05, 2009
Sepoy, you must do more literary fiction. I love it. Like this part: "wonder - loudly - why there is such crap in the market. You will maybe remind yourself - again, loudly - about the most awesome animals you had just purchased last week for a pittance. You will maybe add a few more lines about the general decay in the fortune of Muslims around the world and what the lack of Caliphate has done to the trade in goats." But this... "The deal-maker, will clutch you, and ask the herder to please stop whoring his mother and give you a fair price. The herder will violently shake off the deal-maker, and declare that while the sister of the deal-maker is known to have an easy way , he is far above such petty things." Even in our languages do we find a way to denigrate women. One thing these two tidbits remind me is how exhausting it is to bargain, esp. in Homistan, as you call it. In some cases, it's an art of social intricacies. In Istanbul, Italy, etc I enjoyed it because it was fun and quick. In Nepal, it drove me up the wall, as it was a long, laborious process.
Desi Italiana | February 05, 2009
Pic #5 is beautiful, and the goat looks angelic.
sepoy | February 05, 2009
"literary fiction"? I have a whole dissertation that might qualify.
Desi Italiana | February 05, 2009
Ahhh....now your comment brings us to the debate of defining "literary fiction." What is it? Does it exist? Or is this another Iowa Writer's Workshop ploy to get more people to enroll for a cash cow MFA in "Literary Fiction"? Anyhoo, I am really fixated on that hauntingly gorgeous goat in the rickshaw. Why is its head orange and blue? Holi came a little early to Lahore?
Desi Italiana | February 05, 2009
Such a poetic dignity it has as it proceeds towards its death.
Desi Italiana | February 05, 2009
And the fourth pic of the bakri--wow. They have a heart-wrenching, cotton-y innocence to them. They could have even replaced the sheep in the Bible. Jesusji, please bring salvation to the bakri and bring them home.
Desi Italiana | February 05, 2009
Pic #4 are those goats or sheep? My city eyes and brain betray me, I do not know. Ok, will stop abusing CM with consecutive comments.
elizabeth | February 05, 2009
pray tell, does the autorickshaw driver increase the charge on account of the potential post-goat state of his vehicle?
sarahjane | February 06, 2009
dude you are getting better all the time!
Sacrifice « The Moor’s Last Word | February 06, 2009
[...] recently, over at Chapati Mystery, Sepoy wrote a wonderful post on a Lahori Bakra Mandi (Goat Market) and included beautiful photos. The fifth photo in particular arrested my attention; [...]
preoccupied « verbal privilege | February 13, 2009
[...] photo series on Lahore eating: street food, bakra mandi, and home cooking. Especially the latter, as I had the delight of a sharing a meal at the table [...]
Muhamad | February 19, 2009
'Bakra bazar' has a nice alliterative ring to it.
usamaasad | October 26, 2009
is bar bakra mandi main katna ka bull ho gay
shahid | October 28, 2009
all this talk about goats is making me hungry... I spent two bakra eids back to back in lahore. the mayham at every door on eid day was almost enough to turn me into a vegetarian, well almost... only if i didn't love the taste of meat so much
Shafique | November 18, 2009
This time the most expensive bull in Lahore is at BakraOnline.com. You can purchase your bakar and your qurbani bull from this website Online.
Ayaz Khan | November 26, 2009
Wahooooooooooooooooooo good Picture Ayaz Khan
saqib | October 20, 2010
waaaaaaahhhhhh...bohat achi pix hai really nice
Raza | November 16, 2010
waaaaaaahhhhhh…bohat achi pix hai really nice Wahooooooooooooooooooo good Picture