Adam at the weblog has this great series 'Friday Afternoon Confessional' , I love. Especially on days like today when weeks like this render me feeling unable to cope. I can't really confess, but I do declare.
I declare that I am tired. Woke up tired and 10 hours later, am still tired. In my dream Naim Sahib quizzed me on a Ghalib misrah that I could not remember.
I declare that I hate my dissertation.
I declare that I want a sabbatical.
I declare that I stole the above declaration from Babu.
I declare that ordering food for 40 people and arranging accomodations for 12 people drains one of the very essence of life.
I declare that every day begins anew and ends just as old and tired.
I declare that end is not a mirage but what if you are in quicksand?
I declare that my next conference will be all about historical memory and I will geek out to my heart's content.
I declare that time flies and crawls simultaneously. And it gives me a headache.
I declare that december in lahore will be salve for my soul.
I declare that I am dying to see Snakes on a Plane.
I declare that this post will self-destruct in 23 hours.
I too declare that I am tired and hate my thesis. Why did I ever think I would enjoy writing about this topic? Why did I think anyone would care? Why can't I force myself to buckle-down? I understand, and I feel your pain.
Hating your dissertation is as much a requirement of the dissertation as having a title page and bibliography. I can confidently declare that this feeling creeps up on everyone, so you're not alone.
Snakes on a Plane sounds like the most perfect dissertation-antidote ever. And hey, I wanna come to that conference!
Writing alternative acknowledgements where you write rude things about everyone associated with it instead of the saccharine "I could never have finished it without the help of.." really helps too. Hang in there, Sepoy, ab dilli door nahin.
More sympathy for you Sepoy. I agree with desiknitter about the alternate acknowledgements -- if anything it will help you smile for awhile. Alternate descriptions and titles can be fun -- the da** dissertation, ect. I called mine "Things about dead people" in moments of extreme fustration, especially when people asked me about it.
what if my entire dissertation is alternative? shouldn't i have 'straight' acknowledgments/title etc.? but the night has passed and i have learned to hate. Thanks, kids, y'all are the best. elizabeth and desiknitter - you have been entered in the historical memory conference rolodex.