A solitary Netflix has sat on top of my tv for the last month. It just sits there. Sometimes, it makes it all the way into the DVD tray. Maybe even the menu comes up. Maybe a few scenes play out. But, this is one movie that never ends because it never can begin. There is nothing wrong with movie. I really want to see it. However, as a patron of Netflix for the last three years, I am here to tell you the truth: If you don’t watch it in the first three nights, it will not get watched. I am not claiming this as a universal truth. Just truth in my world. I used to have the three-at-a-time deal. Nothing was more satisfactory, than the swoosh with which I would drop them in the mail. 1. 2. 3. Watched. Tagged. Shipped. Next! Like clockwork. I even would put the pithy two sentence reviews for my Netflix “friends”. Then, one or two discs started to lag. At first I thought it was all those French noirs. But, no. Alexander the Great got shipped back unwatched. Ok, I did TRY to watch it but even the promise of Angeline couldn’t keep me from getting violent after 9 minutes. I switched to one-at-a-time deal. One movie at a time. How simple could it get. Well. That was the end of netflix.
Futility rises because other movies, garnered from other sources vie for attention. Last week, I got really tired. I mean, I _was_ really tired. But I wanted to end this sad run of nights ended with nary a sign of unhealthy escapism. So, I sat and watched Guy Ritchie’s Revolver. What a pound of horse manure that turned out to be. Feeling despondent, I immediately turned to watching Layer Cake. The cumultive effect was that now I have twice as many accents to make my limey friends wince. A side note: Daniel Craig will make a fine James Bond, as long as he plays it sad. Sadly, neither of these movies were Netflixed.
I love the service. I will never be without it. But, it demands too much from me. Its passiveness infuriarates me. I hate the service. I will cancel it tomorrow.